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Dancers always make me wonder. They can move around their bodies according to the rhythm. But I never thought that massal dance can be difficult. Especially if they’re captured by an amateur photographer like me.

As I watched a dance by three girls from a Jogja university in Bandung Indah Plaza four days ago, I realized that slow dancing was much riskier than fast one. Coz, in slow rhythm, the motion’s difference between one dancer and the other one is so easy to be seen by the audiences.

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People often understand about parents’ cry when their children mess up their parents’ life. But I almost never hear that people will understand about children’s cry when their parents mess up the children’s.

What would you do when your parents ill? A friend of mine, just call her name Fredlyn, recently has been complaining. Her old man sounds been sick. It’s not really bad, probably some kinda obese and arthralgia. But I assume that’s disturbing. Obese makes people lazy. And the joint-ache has been troubling that man from moving his arm.

Gosh! And now they keep me from emping?! Photo from http://telegraph.co.uk

According my colleague who cured him, the dad should stop eating purin. And quit smoking. Fredlyn has been helping to limit the diet at home. But the dad got furious, coz he felt been restricted from delicious foods.

As a doctor, I saw Fredlyn might’ve misunderstood about the diet. Actually it’s not about fully restriction from delicious food at all, but it’s just necessary to decrease the portion. But the big problem ain’t Fredlyn. The error point is her dad denies from making up the menu and quitting from cigar.

Fredlyn’s effort to treat her dad has been obstructed since last week the dad declared to quit the therapy. Briefly, the dad gave up from recovering. Fredlyn cried.

I understand what made Fredlyn sad. There’s no children who are happy to see their parents ill. That’s why children always try to keep their parents fit. The problem is, the parents decline healthy life.

People wants to get old in laugh, instead of mourning. Photo from http://todaysseniornetwork.com

I’m sure that Fredlyn ain’t the only one. There are lotta other children suffer coz their parents make too much scene. My mom has been sad coz her mom (my grandma) has been furious if her children (my mom, my uncles, and my aunts) are not around her at 10 am, though it’s office hour. My dad’s been upset coz his mom sacked an housekeeper that we sent for her, though without the housekeeper my grandma won’t be able to clean up the house well. I’ve been also mad at my dad coz recently he didn’t wanna quit snacking chips at midnight, ignoring the fact that he’s diabetic.

We, the children, wants our parents reserved, fit, and being understanding. But parents refused from listening to the solution that we create. Meanwhile, they can’t give better solution for their own good, either. In fact, since Fredlyn’s dad got ill, all he’s been doing is just grousing her around. My mom’s mother has been frustrated of loneliness, that makes her often phoning her children’s office, only to call them home. Last week someone stupid has broken the water pipe at town, made the PAM must switch off water from streaming to houses. That made my grandma had to bail the well alone coz she had sacked the housekeeper. And now I should insulinize my dad. Briefly, when parents mess up, that’s when children are annoyed.

Stay young, stay fit. Being old is about age, instead about mental. Photo from http://divaasia.com

If only children are disaffected, they should’ve been yelling, “Mom, Dad, please don’t be silly!” Parents don’t wanna understand, as they ill, children gets troubled. It’s hectic, and it’s sad. Parents may say to the children, just mind their own business, no need to care about parents, at least parents will die coz they’ve been aging. They never care that as parents die, children gets sad coz nobody will pray for them anymore.

I understand, as someone gets old, problems come up. There’s degradation of organ system’s function at body. There’s degradation of ability to keep their selves from accident. There’s degradation of ability to thinking. But after I saw lotta people start to grouse much as they get old, I’ve started to wonder, as we’re getting older, is there any degradation of mental to be a good person, too?

More aging a person is, then more getting sucks the person becomes.

And I don’t wanna be like that.

Please enjoy your single stage. Coz one half of your life, is ruined by your children. While another half, is ruined by your parents.

Tags: parents

Who said that only relationship can split? Friendship can, also. And its impact is much worse. Sucks, coz the problem can’t end only by a breaking-up. Coz, the memory of the friendship, will still remain.

Friendship can also split, too. And sometimes the impact is much worse than a broken relationship. Photo from http://bollywood.celebden.com

My friend, just call her name Marion, has a clique. They used to go brunch often, and hang out together more often. Then once upon a time, the clique argued. Finally, one of the clique’s member, just call her name Uma, signed out from the gang.

Marion and her fellas felt losing Uma. Nine people, minus Uma, felt something had been missing. But Uma refused to sign in back. Uma hasn’t felt comfy with the group anymore.

It’s more uncomfortable coz the clique works in the same place. Attends the same conference room. In fact, nine of them often interact in the same meeting point. But right when they reveal out of the room, Uma turns to be a stranger for them.

Once upon a time, I went to Marion’s room and view the clique’s photo, got stucked on Marion’s bulletin board. They were holding hand-in-hand, smiling to the camera. Uma was in the picture, too, she laughed out to the camera, too. They looked solid. They must’ve made the photo before the friendship broke up.

I asked why they didn’t make another new photo without Uma. Marion said, they had no time coz they were busy with each stuffs of their own. So Marion just keeps that photo. But Marion covered Uma’s figure with an expired symposium brochure. Uma’s position was at the corner of the line.

Marion was blue coz she was lost her friend. Uma’s picture in the photo broke her heart. Then she covered up Uma’s face, so she didn’t always keep reminds of Uma.

Sometimes shit happens and we must lose our friend in some ways that we don’t want to. Trauma can’t be stopped coz there’s still lotta things which remind us to the (ex-)friend. His picture is still in our room. His gift is still in our wardrobe. His link is still in our blog. More often we see the memories, much more the trauma drives us sad.

An arguing turns into a trauma. Photo from http://free-marriage-counseling.com

The question is, how long will we keep the sadness? Mourning can’t get the missing friend back into our arms again. So the blue has to end. The trauma has to be gone.

Perhaps, the memories don’t need to be eliminated. But getting over them by burying them in safe place, will be enough. Marion prefers covering Uma’s picture behind a brochure. She hides Uma’s gift in the deepest part of her wardrobe. She didn’t remove Uma’s website link, but she just deleted the link from her homepage and she just keeps the link in her Google Reader. That way prevents Marion from losing her friend permanently. Coz one day if she wanna memorize Uma again, she just needs to unload her stuffs in some places which is hard to be seen.

Maybe, the friendship doesn’t really split.

Maybe we need to break for a while, to think how much we hurts each other. Maybe after the breaking, we can start to appreciate each other.

Maybe, we need to break for a while, till we’re able back to appreciate each other and settle down. Our arguing might’ve disappointed us, but the trauma shouldn’t stay longer. Maybe, after the trauma of losing has gone, we both can aware how much we care about each other.

Tags: breaking up, friendship

When the first time I downloaded the complete copy of Friends from #1 season till I-don-know-th season, the few years ago, I saw that the era of book had already finished.

For years, if I set my eyes on a movie’s scenario copy, I should’ve been waiting till the studio published their scenario in a book, then I’d buy the book.

I should wait until the book’s displayed in bookshops, and what annoyed me was, not all of studios would publish books, wouldn’t they?

Now, I don’t need to wait longer for those people to write books. Just google it, and I’ll get any movie scenario that I want. Any.

And eventually, I could get not only my favorite movie scenario, on-line.

I could also get copies of any books.

Recently, I’ve downloaded the original copies of Stephenie Meyer’s Twilight Saga, the four of the books.

Stephenie Meyer's Twilight

This is fascinating, coz the sensation of reading Meyer’s Twilight which has already translated into Indonesian by Gramedia, is different from reading Meyer’s original scene which was written in English.

Yesterday, I went to a book shop for window shopping.

The place was selling second import books. Their qualities were fine though they were second.

And I loved seeing novels written in English.

It was excited, coz I’d been used to see the copies which were translated into Indonesian.

Then I found this, Eoin Colfer’s Artemis Fowl.

Eoin Colfer's Artemis Fowl

It’s New York’s copyright in 2001, the original price was US$ 3.99.

But in the shop, it was sold at Rp 25.000,00 only.

I’d never read it, but I’d been hearing its promotion from my fellas.

They said, it was an excellent book.

I smelled the fragrance of the pages and smiled.

I swore that I really love books which smelled like printing machines like this.

Then I grabbed it home.

At home, I showed it off to my sister.

This is an import book. But I bought it in quarter price.

Then my sister said, “If you’d love to, you can download it in 4shared.com and you can get the original copy in five minutes only.”

The question is, if I can download the book, can I get the smell, too?

That is the strength of an hard copy if you compare it to the soft one which is downloaded.

As you buy a book, there’s a sensation of shopping, about picking up a book among the racks and reading the synopsis written on the back cover.

There’s a sensation of getting confused as you choosing the titles that you wanna buy, while there’s nothing but pennies in your pocket.

There’s a sensation as you sit at the corner of your drawing room by having a cup of coffee, and there’s a passion which streaming on your blood as you’re turning the first page.

There’s a sensation while you’re exhausted of reading and you fall asleep with the book which pages still open on your lap.

You can’t get all of those sensations if you get the book’s content by downloading it on-line.

Though the contents are just the same.

Bookstore doesn’t need to lose the customers though now e-books are rocking.

There are still lotta fanatic book fans, coz reading books ain’t just about reading the content.

Having a book is about appreciating an art creature, and an e-book won’t be able to replace the art of having the hard copy.

Tags: Artemis Fowl, e-book, hard copy